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I don’t believe in the devil, but…

If you’re expecting a post about Pat Robertson’s call for the assassination of Hugo Chavez, you’re going to be disappointed. There are already some very good posts about that here and here if that’s what you’re looking for. This post is something else entirely. This is a post by a man who can’t understand why Robertson’s remarks are newsworthy. Let me explain.

Pat Robertson is a LUNATIC. Let me say that again. America, Pat Robertson is two nails short of a crucifixion, if you know what I mean. Why is anything he says surprising at this point? I don’t normally make blanket statements like this, but if you take Pat Robertson seriously, you’re an idiot. Well, that’s a bit harsh. You may just be crazy. On the other hand, you may be both. There are many bright, well-intentioned, sane Christians out there. There are even a few amongst the evangelicals. However, those who follow Robertson are just out of their heads. This man has been making stupid, inflammatory, unchristian statements for his entire public life. If you’ve started watching the 666 700 Club recently, and you’re just unaware of what an evil madman Robertson is, I apologize for calling you a crazy idiot, and I’m so glad you’ve found this post in time. Read and learn.

“If Christian people work together, they can succeed during this decade in winning back control of the institutions that have been taken from them over the past 70 years. Expect confrontations that will be not only unpleasant but at times physically bloody…. This decade will not be for the faint of heart, but the resolute. Institutions will be plunged into wrenching change. We will be living through one of the most tumultuous periods of human history. When it is over, I am convinced God’s people will emerge victorious.”
       (Pat Robertson’s Perspective Oct-Nov 1992)

“A Supreme Court ruling is not the Law of the United States. The law of the United Sates is the Constitution, treaties made in accordance with the Constitution, and laws duly enacted by the Congress and signed by the president. And any of those things I would uphold totally with all of my strength, whether I agreed with them or not…. I am bound by the laws of the United States and all 50 states … [but] I am not bound by any case or any court to which I myself am not a party…. I don’t think the Congress of the United States is subservient to the courts…. They can ignore a Supreme Court ruling if they so choose.”
       (Washington Post, June 27,1986)

“We have imagined ourselves invulnerable and have been consumed by the pursuit of … health, wealth, material pleasures and sexuality… It [terrorism] is happening because God Almighty is lifting his protection from us.”
       (September 13, 2001, explaining the September 11 attacks)

“You say you’re supposed to be nice to the Episcopalians and the Presbyterians and the Methodists and this, that, and the other thing. Nonsense. I don’t have to be nice to the spirit of the Antichrist. I can love the people who hold false opinions but I don’t have to be nice to them.”
       (700 Club, January 14, 1991)

“I know it sounds somewhat Machiavellian and evil, to think that you could send a squad in to take out somebody like Osama bin Laden, or to take out the head of North Korea, but isn’t it better to do something like that, to take out Milosevic, to take out Saddam Hussein, rather than to spend billions of dollars on a war that harms innocent civilians and destroys the infrastructure of a country?”
       (700 Club, August 9, 1999)

“The feminist agenda is not about equal rights for women. It is about a socialist, anti-family political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism, and become lesbians.”
       (fundraising letter, 1992)

“Many of those people involved with Adolph Hitler were Satanists, many of them were homosexuals — the two things seem to go together.”
       (700 Club, January 21, 1993)

“I think ‘one man, one vote,’ just unrestricted democracy, would not be wise. There needs to be some kind of protection for the minority which the white people represent now, a minority, and they need and have a right to demand a protection of their rights.”
       (speaking about South Africa, promoting the idea that white votes should count more heavily, 700 Club, March 18, 1992)

“Just like what Nazi Germany did to the Jews, so liberal America is now doing to the evangelical Christians. It’s no different. It is the same thing. It is happening all over again. It is the Democratic Congress, the liberal-based media and the homosexuals who want to destroy the Christians. Wholesale abuse and discrimination and the worst bigotry directed toward any group in America today. More terrible than anything suffered by any minority in history.”
       (1993 interview)

Had enough yet?

Is he just an idiot? Is he evil? Is he a megalomaniac? Is it just about the money? Who’s to say? Who cares? The moral of the story is that this man cannot be taken seriously. I think he only makes statements like this for the coverage. If it gets more people watching the show, even for a while, he gets what he wants, whatever that is. He’s like a stray dog. If we ignore him, he’ll go away. If we pet him, he’ll stick around. If we feed him, he’s ours forever.

Here’s a question for you. What’s the difference between Pat Robertson and Usama Bin Laden? You can find out for yourself by taking this quiz. Based on my score of 10 out of 20 (the most likely score given random answer selection) there is none. In fact, try this analogy on for size. Pat Robertson is to Eric Rudolph as Usama Bin Laden is to Muhammad Atta. If we call UBL a terrorist, what does that make Robertson?

If you take the quiz, post your score in the comments. I’m curious to see how everyone does.

~I AM~

27 Responses to “I don’t believe in the devil, but…”

  1. Seth Says:

    Holy cheese, I got 7 out of 20. [shudders]

    “Many of those people involved with Adolph Hitler were Satanists, many of them were homosexuals — the two things seem to go together.”

    That quote can only be responded to with a teenage internet colloquialism:

    …wtf?

  2. jdt Says:

    14 of 20. Tough calls, I kept looking for c: All of the above.

  3. Delta Says:

    I only got 10 out of 20 as well. I knew he’s said some crazy stuff before, but damn. It’s so depressing that he actually has a following. My brother’s girlfriend has parents who sit on the couch all day and pray while they watch his show. I’ve never seen it, but from how it was described to me it made me sick.

    And thanks for the plug I AM :)

  4. Charles Watkins Says:

    Another 10.

  5. Antigone Says:

    15 out of 20, but most of them I knew from blogs. Trick, if it refers to “believers” it’s Muslim, if it refers to modern things “like fumigation” it’s a Christian.

  6. Angie Says:

    9 out of 20.

    They are all wackos in my book tho.

  7. Teotwawki23 Says:

    Dang. I got 10 out of 20 as well. Guess I went too easy on Osama, eh?

    But, seriously — why isn’t anyone reporting Pat Robertson to the FBI as having made terroristic threats? Which he did. And, unless we want Venezuela to cut off their sweet, sweet oil from us, at the rate of two tankers per day, we’d damn well better turn his ass over to some world court damn fast.

    And I’d love that. Oh yeah — Robertson on a one-way ticket to Gitmo? Let’s bring it on….

  8. Matt Says:

    16 out of 20, but I’ve seen some of those before.

  9. Vic Says:

    11 out of 20. That’s scary. And disappointing.

  10. addict_no_more Says:

    Wow, I also got 10 right. Horrifying.

    And every time I hear that 9-11 quote, I want someone to assassinate Pat Robertson. Then again, I sometimes wonder if that’s not what he’s hoping for. How any HUMAN can say the things he does, and not expect someone to try to take him out is beyond me.

    Think he wears a bullet proof vest?

  11. Aeger Says:

    11 out of 20. Why did I get more than Seth? Strange. . .

    And he’s not human, he’s clearly from Pluto. Just look into the eyes and you’ll see what I mean.

  12. Aaron Kinney Says:

    Damn, only 9 out of 20.

  13. I Am Says:

    That’s an average score of 11 with 12 people checking in so far.

  14. Uberkuh Says:

    11/20: I chose Jerry and Pat for all.

  15. Joe Says:

    I got 10 also……………..I obviously need to ‘know my religious fanatics’ better

  16. Tanooki Joe Says:

    12 out of 20.

    Man, these people piss me off. How anyone can believe both in majoritarianism and that they are a persecuted minority without they’re head exploding is beyond me.

  17. LuckyandPozzo Says:

    11/20. *sigh*

  18. Radi Says:

    10 correct. But I really wouldn’t be surprised if all of those statements came from either crazy bunch.

    … which brings up unpleasant associations with the Hindu fanatic crazy bunch in India *sigh*

  19. MBains Says:

    10 of 20

    And Radi, you bring up an interesting question: I wonder what Usama has to say about India… I’ve not read one thing.

    Finally, I think Patty missed the point with this quote:

    “Many of those people involved with Adolph Hitler were Satanists, many of them were homosexuals — the two things seem to go together.”
    (700 Club, January 21, 1993)

    Most of “those people” were Christians.

    Ignorant IDiot…

  20. sappho Says:

    Amen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Funny, and witty, as well as very true! Love your blog….gonna recommend it on mine…check it out at…………….sapphomanifesto.blogspot.com

  21. Pyro_Shark Says:

    11. I don’t get it, I guessed Pat Robertson for every one. I thought for sure I’d be right!

  22. Mio Says:

    10. Creepy.

  23. rmadison Says:

    14/20 – Missed 6

    Three times I thought the quote was something Jerry or Pat would probably say, and the other three were quotes I figured Osama would say.

    (In no particular order)

    Your answer: Usama Bin Ladin
    Correct answer: Jerry Falwell

    Your answer: Usama Bin Ladin
    Correct answer: Pat Robertson

    Your answer: Usama Bin Ladin
    Correct answer: Jerry Falwell

    Your answer: Jerry Falwell or Pat Robertson
    Correct answer: Usama Bin Ladin

    Your answer: Jerry Falwell or Pat Robertson
    Correct answer: Usama Bin Ladin

    Your answer: Jerry Falwell or Pat Robertson
    Correct answer: Usama Bin Ladin

    The questions I missed were numbers 1,6,7.9,13 and 17

  24. DUB Says:

    12 out of 20.

    I actually found myself guessing based on the choice of language. Not to confuse this maniacal thinking with intellect, but I just didn’t see Pat or Jerry saying, “remains a strong bulwark for religion.”

    Boy, Pat sure has a penchant for hyperbole…

    “We will be living through one of the most tumultuous periods of human history.”

    “More terrible than anything suffered by any minority in history.”

    Oh, yeah, sure thing, buddy.

  25. Constantine (a.k.a Mithra Save) Says:

    Your score: 11 out of 20

    I say leave Patty alone. Take it from a former GEEZUS freak, you don’t need to give xians any more martyristic ambition.

    The guy is a brain-washed loon and should be treated as such. Xians speak out of both sides of their mouth.

  26. vagodin Says:

    15 out of 20 which I thought was very good considering I haven’t heard a single thing Bin Ladin has said (in English at least).

  27. freewebs.com/dandelionseeds Says:

    Many those people involved with bigotry were also homophobes, most were closet homosexuals — The two things seem to go together
    ___
    http://www.freewebs.com/dandelionseeds