Comments on: Dead Girls and Lost Boys: A Solution

By: I Am

I Am — Sun, 14 Aug 2005 19:34:50 +0000

“Population sex ratios in China do not fit the category of ‘normal.’ For centuries or even millennia, China’s population has had an abnormal shortage of females. Evidence from China’s last dynasty, the Qing dynasty 1644-1911, indicates a shortage of girls in families from the highest social classes to the lowest (Lee and Wang 1999). The dearth of girls was caused by female infanticide immediately after birth (drowning, exposure, suffocation, abandonment) or by untimely childhood deaths through selective neglect or maltreatment of girls.

Why were some daughters killed, abandoned, neglected, or maltreated to death in old China? The main reason was a strong Confucian value system that honoured almost all males over nearly all females. Important religious and ancestral rituals were reserved for males. It was believed, and still is today, that the family lineage can be continued only through sons; this attitude is especially strong in Taiwan and southeast parts of the Chinese mainland (Poston et al. 2000; Yang and Chen 2003). Men but not women owned property. A girl was owned by her father and a woman was controlled by her husband and his family. At marriage in her late teens, a daughter was lost to her natal family as she married out to a different village and thereafter worked for and cared for her husband’s relatives. A daughter was generally seen as costing more to her parents than they would ever get back from her. Therefore daughters, at least some daughters, were treated as expendable.”

http://www.findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m0PCG/is_1_21/ai_n6155263

By: exmoron

exmoron — Fri, 12 Aug 2005 18:01:53 +0000

A couple of thoughs:

(1) I didn’t mean to imply that you (I Am) were referring to the main body of Mormons. It just seemed that the discussion in the comments was headed that way. I figured I should make that clear.

(2) Anyone have a good link on sex selection in China and its history?

(3) The question of outlawing polygamy is a tough one (even though it is already outlawed in the U.S.). If we are going to outlaw everything that leads to problems, then why haven’t we outlawed guns (which cause far more heartache than polygamy)? It’s all about a balance between personal liberty and protecting the innocent. I don’t think there’s an easy answer here, but regulating people’s sex lives is a little farther than I’m willing to go. I agree with addict_no_more to some extent, I have no problem with people living in communal relationships and having orgies every night, as long as no one is forced to participate. It’s the lack of personal liberty/choice that is disturbing to me.

By: Radi

Radi — Fri, 12 Aug 2005 17:37:50 +0000

Female infanticide has been practiced so well, so enthusiastically and for so long in parts of western India (specifically, the state of Punjab) that there are not many local women available to get married, so the unmarried young men are importing brides from other parts of India in order to raise families… Good, in that they learn something a wee bit less insular, BAD if they refuse to learn from their parents’ mistakes and continue to kill girl babies. Anyone care to guess what they’ll do? *rolls eyes*

By: addict_no_more

addict_no_more — Fri, 12 Aug 2005 16:17:32 +0000

Sorry, the above should have said that infanticide seems especially prevalent in rural areas, followed by the bit about the skewed ratios of boys to girls.

By: addict_no_more

addict_no_more — Fri, 12 Aug 2005 16:15:06 +0000

I’ve seen pictures of dead, abandoned baby girls on Chinese streets. It is very much still a problem there. In some areas of China, particularly rural parts where selective abortion isn’t common/possible, there are so many more baby boys than girls that polyandry is gonna have to be practiced in that country.

I’ve heard far more negative stories about polygamy than positive ones. I generally don’t agree that people should be told what to do with their personal lives, but I’ve read a lot about polyandry and polygyny in many different societies/cultures and they rarely work. People are jealous by nature. It is extremely difficult for everyone to be emotionally fulfilled in plural relationships.

Furthermore, I have a problem with the vast numbers of children often born into polygynous relationships. I’ve read stories of many people who grew up feeling they didn’t really get to know their fathers - because when there are that many kids how much quality time does any one child get?

Obviously, plenty of similar problems exist in monogamous relationships, too. Plenty of people cheat, or have multiple marriages over time… but it’s still not quite the same thing.

I’ve argued before that marriage, as we define it, has become meaningless to most (though not to me or my husband)… people just don’t care. So in that sense, there’s no point in regulating any of it.

We may as well all have multiple partners, join a commune and just have orgies. Okay, I don’t think my husband is reading, but if you are, dear… I don’t mean “us” when I saw “we”.